How it all started

My Driver's licence has expired... been too busy to go renew it, plus all the wahala to get another one, chai no an easy somtin o...So here I am, driving on Osborne road, music on full blast,

So there i was driving along Osborne road, Buju Banton's "boom bye bye" on repeat.  As I approach the bend before the turning into dolphin estate I sight the patrol van of the FRSC men... OMG! I sit up and look straight ahead. Then it happened.... this tall fine looking road marshal stopped the car in front of me, then he looked at me and pulled me over.

As i put my car to a halt this Tall fine Road marshall walked up to me in his cowboy hat....

#FunkeVsRoadMarshal

Season 1 Episode 1

Me: *in my best yankee accent* Good day sir... smiling from ear to ear

RM: Good afternoon ma'am
Ehen, issorai, he returned my yankee greeting...  he then leaned forward into my passenger side window... I could smell his aftershave... hmmmmmm ok... make I dey see wetin he wan do.

RM: May I have ur driver's licence and registration please

Me: ok sir

I leaned forward to the passenger side to remove it from the glove compartment but he was in the way... I looked at him and told him to move so that i could reach the glove compartment and he smiled.... Omo see set of perfect white teeth ooo! He moved and I gave him my papers, carefully leaving out my driving licence...

RM: may I have ur licence please.
me looking surprised and i began to search frantically for wetin no lost.....

Me: Goodness, i must have forgotten it in my other bag,

RM; Look for it ma'am better u have an expired one than none at all.

I smiled and gave him my expired one...

He looked at me and said "Gimme one good reason why i shouldn't  book u ma'am"?

I batted my eyelids and said cos u are a nice man..

He laughed and told me to get down from the car.... Chai, my charms no work oo...
I followed him to his patrol car and he brings out a form.

I filled it and gave my office address even plus including my phone no.... He then looked at me and said, "On second thoughts, lemme let this pass"... Phew... I thanked him and he walked me back to my car. He gave me a stern warning on the dangers of driving without proper documents and drivers licence.  He goes on to let me know that its a criminal offence in Nigeria, and that it could land me prison.

I apologise and promise to update and renew all pending documents. He walks me back to my car, opens the door for me and then he shuts the door behind me. He looks at me and smiles, and he says "See you some other time" I laughed and was like... O ti shii... I drive back to my office feeling acomplished. I was happy he didn't book me.

I park at my office parking lot and rush up the staircase,  I have a lot of work to do, so many sales reports to turn in today and I've been set back by at least 1 hour.

I finish my reports just in time and I drive home.

Too tired to cook dinner, so I stop at a fast food restaurant on the way.

8pm and I'm in my living room, I have just eaten dinner and I flip the TV station to NatGeo Wild. I  drift off to sleep.

The next day, I am in my office, work done and and it's nearly lunchtime, I'm bored,  looking for excitement and then suddenly the desk phone rings, there was someone looking for me downstairs in the car showroom, apparently there's a customer who has requested to see me, he wants to buy a car..

I go downstairs and I see this tall fine man dressed in atiku....  OMG!!

Osheyy baddest! I like men who have taste...he was neatly dressed in white atiku outfit a matching hausa cap to match and he had on this lovely Bally sandals to go sef..  As I waked in the showroom he smiled and he stretched out his hand and we shook hands... his palms were as soft as a baby's ownm he then asked to see the vehicles. I asked his budget and then i showed cars i  that range to him. One after the other, I explained the functions and specifications of each carm but instead of looking at what i was explaining to him, this man just  dey look my face... Shuo!!! broda kilode o...

He eventually makes a selection and I get up to make him a proforma invoice.

I handed him his proforma invoice and he then asks, "do u recognize me"?... I looked him straight in the eye and said NOPE!!!

Then he smiled.... OMG I remember that dentition!!! Then my jaw dropped and he laughed.. I frowned.... He laughed harder. AWKWARD!!! "How the hell did this guy know where to find me???? Then it hit me, the form I was filling before he changed his mind and let me go.

WHAT A CROCK!!!!! I practically shot myself in the foot.

he then asks... "What are you doing for lunch".....

Una wan know wetin happen next ba???..

Ok will tell u when i come back from Lunch!............

To Be Continued. ....